Monday, February 25, 2008

Thank Heaven for Temples

Right after Parker died I remember having this overwhelming desire to go to the temple. I not only wanted to go, I longed for it. I knew that being in the temple is the one place I could go here on earth to feel as close to my son as possible. After I healed from the delivery I headed down to the temple. I felt such peace there. Just sitting in the Celestial room brought a warmth to my heart.
Even now I love to sit in the Celestial room. I always feel a smile sneak upon my face and a warmth fill my heart when I think of Parker. It's kind of our special place.
I am grateful for this gospel and the opportunity I have to go to the temple. I am thankful for the peace and comfort it brings. I am thankful for personal revelation, especially that received in the Celestial room at the temple.
I thank my Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, prophets, and church leaders for the temple! Whatever would I do without them!

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

My Happy Place

Last night the Fire Department had a meeting for the Firefighters and their wives. It was a Critical Incident Stress Debriefing meeting. The lady taught us about the type of stress the firefighters have after some of the things they see while on a call. We also learned how to manage the feelings that arise because of the things the firefighters see. It was a very interesting meeting.

The most interesting part to me was when the instructor had us close our eyes. She peacefully talked us through what she wanted us to visualize. We were supposed to walk toward a door (any type of door) and slowly open it. Once inside the door, we were supposed to visualize a place. Most people chose to visualize somewhere that they had been before - a cabin, their favorite fishing place, their porch, etc. My place was a little different.

I visualized a place I had never been before. It was bright and sunny, with beautifully lush trees. There was green grass everywhere and I was dressed in white walking through it barefoot. It felt so good underneath my feet! And then rather than just imagining the place, I also imagined that Parker was there. I ran to him and held him in my arms. He was still an infant and I was able to hold, kiss, and rock him to sleep. I felt as if I were in heaven. It's the closest I've felt to him in a long time.

Then the instructor told us to walk back toward the door and come back to reality. I nearly cried as I placed my son back on the grass and walked toward the door. Actually, I did cry. It was one of the worst feelings ever. I thought, "How dare you bring me to such a happy place and then make me go back!" Ha ha ha!

The instructor had us open our eyes. She told us that the place we had just imagined was our "happy place" - a place where we will always feel peaceful and joyful.

Of course it is true. My son will always bring me peace and joy. I loved the experience I had and I was grateful to realize that Parker is in my happy place. I'd like to go there again!