Monday, June 15, 2009

Little Hands

When my son died, I was given a precious gift. A lady in town made a plaster cast of Parker's hands. I was so grateful for this gift because it was something tangible that I could look at every day and remember my son. I can remember just how perfect his little hands were. For years I've wished I could properly thank this kind lady for making this for me. About a month ago, I finally got my chance.
I was working at the bookstore when I overheard an employee helping a customer. It was a man and he was giving the employee his name and address so he could be put into our rewards system. I heard the last name and immediately recognized it as the last name of the woman who made my precious gift. I noticed a woman standing with the man and so I walked over to the register. I asked her first name and then realized it was the woman who I've been wanting to thank.
I asked her if she was the lady who made the plaster cast of the hands of babies who died. She told me yes. I told her that she made some for me when my son died. She completely remembered who I was, and she even remembered where I had lived at the time. That was amazing to me since it has almost been five years.
I suddenly felt overwhelmed with emotion. Not only was I feeling a deep love and sense of gratitude for the gift this lady had given me, but I also felt extremely touched that she was one of the very few people who was able to hold my son in this life. That is so special to me to know that she saw my son and that she held him.
My eyes filled with tears as I expressed my gratitude for what she did for me. I explained to her that it is my absolute most-prized possession. I asked if I could give her a hug and she welcomed it. I hope she knows how much her act of service means to me.
After she left I completely broke down and cried. I had to run to the backroom and take a few minutes to compose my emotions. I'm not sure why the whole thing made me cry. Maybe it was because I finally got to thank her. Maybe it's because the gift means so much to me. Maybe it's because she knew my son. Maybe it's because she remembered him after all this time. I guess it could be a culmination of all those things. Either way, I welcomed the tears, I cherished the memory. It's okay to cry when you need to. Even if it's been almost five years. Tears are healing and therapeutic. They help me feel close to my son.
In short, I just feel truly blessed to have been able to finally thank this kind lady. I cherish this gift every day. I am thankful that I was given the opportunity to meet her. Thank you!


Roberts' family said...

What beautiful and special gift. Jenny, you have such a faith filled heart that brings peace to my own heart. thank you.

Trent Megan and Kids said...

I have to let my tears flow too. What a special thought from someone who knew you would need that in the years to come. I look forward to the time when I can hold Parker in my arms as well. I love you Jenny!!!